Two posts in one day, aren't you lucky??? I just got off the phone with my Mom, and I've decided to keep this as a true W30, which will make my last day next Tuesday. I need more variety, I need permission to make choices, I need to not have to eat eggs and meat when I don't want them. I need the freedom to not have to cook every day. I need to learn to eat in a way that is healthy, but also sustainable long-term. Once I hit next Tuesday, I will have done 2 W30's in 4 months. I've proven to myself that I can do it, and that I have incredible willpower. However, that willpower has shown itself within very strict guidelines. I need to be able to make good choices within a more flexible way of eating. My Mom reminded me that I had amazing success, for a very long time, on WW. Perhaps it's time to take the best of WW and the W30 and combine the two.
What I want to take from the W30 is to limit sugar, processed foods, and dairy (and to make sure that, as much as possible, the dairy I do have is organic.) What I want to take from WW is the ability to have ANYTHING I WANT as long as I am accountable for it. I want carbs...not bagels every morning and pasta every night, but I want to be able to have sushi rolls on a hot night when I don't want to cook, and don't want anything hot. I want to, on occasion, have an ice cream at the pool with my nieces and nephews. I want to go to Saladworks and let them put dressing on my salad. I want to go out to celebrate a friend's birthday and not have to choose something on the menu which, while very good, would not have been my first, or even second, choice.
I need some freedom. Perhaps it is better to stop before I go on vacation. I did sort of worry that I'd go wild after being deprived for so long. Only time will tell if I'm making the right decision. All I know is that, when the heartburn was really bothering me last night, I was wishing that I could drink some milk or eat of piece of bread to settle my stomach. I want to have the freedom to make the choices that feel right for me. I've proven to myself that I can deny myself many things. Now, I need to prove to myself that I can handle freedom.
Rose, you are doing such a great job, and there is no shame in stopping. You're ready to stop; you're ready to make choices because of you, not because of a plan's strict rules. (I love the idea of the plan, but you've done two and you've proven you can do it.) You are equipped with the knowledge to make better choices for yourself, but you know that one ice cream with your family at the pool does not mean you can't control yourself! I feel as though the Whole30 became a diet instead of a new lifestyle for you, and haven't you had enough of diets? Enjoy life while making healthy choices when you can. We're forty now. Isn't that what we're supposed to be doing?? : )
ReplyDeleteP.S. I started drinking diet tonic water at night (not allowed on the Whole30, I know!) when I was wanting a sweet and found that it helped to ease the cravings a little (maybe like your seltzer?). Doesn't mean I ALWAYS pick the diet tonic, but even sometimes makes me feel a little better about myself and my choices!