Finally! I went to WW this morning, and was down 3.4 lbs! Thank God! I'm finally back out of the 160's, although barely. I was getting very discouraged, feeling like I was never going to lose weight again. I knew going in this morning that I'd lost, but didn't know how much. I'm sure most of it is water, but that needs to come off too, so who cares? I can already tell that my pants fit better. I have a Communion party to go to on May 9th, and have promised Jeff that I will wear a dress he has seen me in in pictures, and really likes. If I'm going to keep that promise, I still have some work to do. But now it seems possible...I'm re-energized.
People want to know how I did it. Since Monday, I've done shakes (from The Virgin Diet) for breakfast and lunch. I think I did it Saturday and Sunday too, but my dinner/dessert Sunday was big, so I don't think I can really count that day. Saturday I was sick, and ate very little, so that probably helped. Monday night I went out for Indian food, but last night I had a Virgin Diet compliant dinner...for the most part. I'm not being totally strict (ff creamer in my coffee, because I don't like the coconut milk creamer, chili seasoning in my chili that has flour and sugar in it, etc.) I'm mainly trying to do the 2 shakes and a compliant dinner as many days as I can. This Sunday, Jeff and I are going out to dinner with a friend of mine from HS and her husband. I will eat what I want (within reason.) I know that doing something like this is not sustainable forever, but right now I need to see and feel things moving in the right direction. I am officially training for my half marathon now, and I need to be lighter, so that running is easier. I need to fit into my spring and summer clothes. I want to fit into that dress by May 9th. I want to get back to maintaining, and not losing. I had gotten really good at maintaining, but I'm no longer great at losing. I want to get the weight off, or at least some of it, fast, and then get back to what I did for 5 years.
Wednesday, March 25, 2015
Wednesday, March 18, 2015
Frustrated
I was up 0.8 at WW this morning. Since I've started weighing in weekly, over a month ago, I have not been down even one time. I'm either up, or the same. Have I been perfect? Of course not. But do I think I deserve to have at least lost 1 stinking pound? Hell yes! Maybe I'm viewing my past weight loss success through rose colored glasses, but I feel like I used to have so much more wiggle room than I seem to have now (none). I'm not even going up and down, and I'm starting to wonder if I'm capable of losing any weight ever again!
I'm worried it's that I'm older (I turn 42 tomorrow). I'm worried it's because I'm not exercising as much as I used to. I'm worrying that my eating needs to be perfect, all the time. If it does, then let's face it, I won't ever lose another pound, because perfection is not possible.
This week has been tough. My boyfriend Jeff met my parents Sunday at a restaurant where we celebrated my birthday with a nice dinner. Monday there was a party for me at work with pastries, yesterday was St. Patrick's Day, and my SIL Terri treated me to breakfast for my birthday. Tomorrow is my birthday, and Jeff is cooking me dinner. I know that these things only happen once a year, and I refuse to not celebrate and enjoy it. I also know it's not a license to go overboard.
I've decided to start drinking protein shakes for breakfast and lunch whenever possible (meaning I don't have plans for either of those meals), and then do a sensible dinner. I'm not doing the Virgin Diet again, although the shakes are from the book. They give me a lot of protein, fruits and veggies, keep my calories under control, are filling, easy, and fit well into my lifestyle when I'm working. I know I'll get sick of them eventually, but I need a jumpstart to prove to myself that this weight can, and will, come off!
I'm worried it's that I'm older (I turn 42 tomorrow). I'm worried it's because I'm not exercising as much as I used to. I'm worrying that my eating needs to be perfect, all the time. If it does, then let's face it, I won't ever lose another pound, because perfection is not possible.
This week has been tough. My boyfriend Jeff met my parents Sunday at a restaurant where we celebrated my birthday with a nice dinner. Monday there was a party for me at work with pastries, yesterday was St. Patrick's Day, and my SIL Terri treated me to breakfast for my birthday. Tomorrow is my birthday, and Jeff is cooking me dinner. I know that these things only happen once a year, and I refuse to not celebrate and enjoy it. I also know it's not a license to go overboard.
I've decided to start drinking protein shakes for breakfast and lunch whenever possible (meaning I don't have plans for either of those meals), and then do a sensible dinner. I'm not doing the Virgin Diet again, although the shakes are from the book. They give me a lot of protein, fruits and veggies, keep my calories under control, are filling, easy, and fit well into my lifestyle when I'm working. I know I'll get sick of them eventually, but I need a jumpstart to prove to myself that this weight can, and will, come off!
Wednesday, March 11, 2015
I'm Famous!!!
Well, at least in my mind I am! Seriously, one of the coolest things I've ever experienced was being interviewed for, and then listening to, my episode of the Half Size Me Show (#161)! You can listen to my episode by clicking here. I've gotten very positive feedback from friends, family, and fellow HSMC members. I also received new blog followers, and an email from a man who lost 291 lbs, and said that he can relate to my struggles with maintenance. It's been incredibly rewarding, and I feel so lucky to have been given the opportunity to tell my story in such a unique way.
The biggest surprise for me has been how much I've gotten from listening to my own interview. It came out on Monday, and I've listened to it 3.5 times! The first time was at 5am Monday morning, after it first came out. The second time was on Monday when I was running on the treadmill, and the 3rd time was Monday evening in the car while I was out running errands. This morning I went to the gym to run, and started out listening to an audiobook. But the run felt hard today, so I switched over to my podcast. Hearing myself say that I knew that the weight would never win because I would never give up, pushed me through a difficult workout. Before last night's HSMC meeting, Heather and I were talking. I said that hearing myself speaking so logically, authoritatively, but also honestly about what I did, what I need to do, and how hard it is, empowers me to push forward now. I feel like hearing my own words, in my own voice, will be an invaluable tool to help me get back to where I want to be, and stay there. It's an amazing gift I was given, and I'm so grateful!
I weighed in at WW today, and was up 0.8 lbs from last week. Considering that I weighed myself on Monday and was up 2.5 lbs, I will take the 0.8! I was talking to my boyfriend this morning, and told him that the key for me now is to get the weekends under control. His response? "We can do that together." That kind of support is so helpful...I am very lucky! We agreed that we still want to eat out, but maybe need to do an appetizer OR dessert, not both. I also need to stop looking at every meal out as a "special occasion" (ie; an excuse to eat whatever I want), and make better choices. He can support me, but he can't do it for me. Ultimately, what I eat is my decision, and only I can do the work that needs to be done.
After WW, I went to the gym and ran. I normally run on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but Tuesday I had a hair appointment, and tomorrow I have continuing education all day long. Rather than use those as excuses to not run, I just shuffled things around. Tomorrow and Friday I'll get my exercise in by walking from Penn Station to Bryant Park and back. If the weather is anything like it is today, I'll enjoy those walks immensely!! After my run, I was hungry, because I rarely eat before I work out. I wanted a bagel with cream cheese, but I had that yesterday during my hair appointment, and want to keep that as a treat. Instead, I bought a 2 pack of hardboiled eggs at Wawa, along with my coffee, and ate those instead.
My focus right now is on staying at around 1500 calories a day (with free fruits and veggies), increasing my protein and water intake, and starting to train for my June half marathon. If I do those things, weight loss will follow. I'm in a very good place right now mentally, and am looking forward to the warm weather, trips I have planned, and getting to a place physically where I feel best. I know it will happen if I put the work in, and I will...quitting is NOT an option!
The biggest surprise for me has been how much I've gotten from listening to my own interview. It came out on Monday, and I've listened to it 3.5 times! The first time was at 5am Monday morning, after it first came out. The second time was on Monday when I was running on the treadmill, and the 3rd time was Monday evening in the car while I was out running errands. This morning I went to the gym to run, and started out listening to an audiobook. But the run felt hard today, so I switched over to my podcast. Hearing myself say that I knew that the weight would never win because I would never give up, pushed me through a difficult workout. Before last night's HSMC meeting, Heather and I were talking. I said that hearing myself speaking so logically, authoritatively, but also honestly about what I did, what I need to do, and how hard it is, empowers me to push forward now. I feel like hearing my own words, in my own voice, will be an invaluable tool to help me get back to where I want to be, and stay there. It's an amazing gift I was given, and I'm so grateful!
I weighed in at WW today, and was up 0.8 lbs from last week. Considering that I weighed myself on Monday and was up 2.5 lbs, I will take the 0.8! I was talking to my boyfriend this morning, and told him that the key for me now is to get the weekends under control. His response? "We can do that together." That kind of support is so helpful...I am very lucky! We agreed that we still want to eat out, but maybe need to do an appetizer OR dessert, not both. I also need to stop looking at every meal out as a "special occasion" (ie; an excuse to eat whatever I want), and make better choices. He can support me, but he can't do it for me. Ultimately, what I eat is my decision, and only I can do the work that needs to be done.
After WW, I went to the gym and ran. I normally run on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but Tuesday I had a hair appointment, and tomorrow I have continuing education all day long. Rather than use those as excuses to not run, I just shuffled things around. Tomorrow and Friday I'll get my exercise in by walking from Penn Station to Bryant Park and back. If the weather is anything like it is today, I'll enjoy those walks immensely!! After my run, I was hungry, because I rarely eat before I work out. I wanted a bagel with cream cheese, but I had that yesterday during my hair appointment, and want to keep that as a treat. Instead, I bought a 2 pack of hardboiled eggs at Wawa, along with my coffee, and ate those instead.
My focus right now is on staying at around 1500 calories a day (with free fruits and veggies), increasing my protein and water intake, and starting to train for my June half marathon. If I do those things, weight loss will follow. I'm in a very good place right now mentally, and am looking forward to the warm weather, trips I have planned, and getting to a place physically where I feel best. I know it will happen if I put the work in, and I will...quitting is NOT an option!
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Like a ship, adrift at sea...
I'm feeling a bit lost, frustrated, and confused. I weighed myself this morning and was the same as last Wednesday. I'm not surprised, but I am disappointed, because tomorrow is my weigh-in day. I tracked all but Sunday, but was over 29 all but today...well, even today I was at 31, and I used more than my 49 extra and activity points for the week...I'm in the dreaded negative!! I really prefer using MFP to etools...I actually hate etools! I feel like what I use to track is much less important than finding a range (calories, points, whatever), and sticking to it. So I'm going to experiment. If 50 cal is approx 1 point, and I aim for 29 points a day, then I should be eating around 1500 cal (keeping fruits and veggies free, like on WW). The 49 extra points that WW allows are about 2500 cal to splurge for the week. I'm gonna go at it this way for a week, and see what happens. My pants are tight, running is hard, because I'm carrying about 15 more pounds than last year, and im not happy with how I look, or my clothes feel. I need to stop the nonsense and just do something, anything! I will combine the 2 plans, taking the parts I like best from both, and cross my fingers.
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