It's Memorial Day Weekend, which means the official beginning of summer! I don't usually like the summer, because I can't stand the heat and humidity, but this year I'm kind of looking forward to it. They say that summer bodies are made in the winter, and that was just proven to me. I am going to my community pool tomorrow for the first time, so I took out all of my bathing suits to wash, and I tried them all on first. Of course I can always find things to dislike, mainly from the waist down, but overall I was very happy with what I saw in the mirror! I love the way my arms, shoulders and back look after 6 months of working with my trainer, and doing yoga. I've always liked the shape of my calves, but now they are more muscular from all the running I've been doing, and I can even live with my thighs. My waist is smaller, and my stomach is flatter, but the biggest difference between this summer and last is that my confidence is so much greater than it has ever been.
Over the past year, I've worked on myself in so many different ways. I buckled down on WW to lose the extra 15 or so pounds that I had gained. I've also increased my activity level, and varied the activities I do...running for cardio, my trainer for strength, and yoga for strength, flexibility, clarity of thinking, and time to just stop and breathe.
When we think about "working on ourselves", I think most of us think about working on the outside...losing weight, toning up, changing our hair, buying new clothes, whatever. We tend to be very aware of the things about our physical appearance that we want to change. This makes these things easy to work on, whether or not we are successful. Working on ourselves internally is more difficult, in my opinion, because we are such complicated beings, that it's hard to know where to start. If you have been a certain way for as long as you can remember, how do you even begin to change? Isn't it just who you are? There are things about myself that I knew I wanted to change but, like everything, until I was really ready, it wasn't going to happen. I have finally begun to learn how to get out of my own way, and to embrace my life as an incredible roller coaster ride. If you don't take risks, you can't possibly receive any rewards, and you won't grow as a person. In many ways, I feel like this is my time. I feel badly for people who seem to have peaked in high school or college. Sure, I wish that I had been thinner, more confident, more social, whatever, back then. However, no matter how confident you are as a teenager, it cannot possibly be as complete a confidence as can be had in adulthood. I have a self-awareness now that was just not possible back then. I speak up for myself, I take care of myself, and I love myself...faults and all. I know what I want, and I know what I deserve. Each day is a gift, and I feel so blessed to be living this life at this time. It's taken a long time, and I've worked really hard to get to this point, but it makes being here now that much sweeter. I'm hoping that the Summer of 2014 lives up to my expectations, but whatever happens, I'm going to enjoy the ride!
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